‘Low Notes’ Archive

Crossing the Mississippi of Life

Tuesday, May 28th, 2024

As some of you may recall, my wife, She Who Must Be Taunted, and I have taken two loooong trips around the U S of A in a series of trusty Honda hatchbacks. Each time, we were on the road for a bit more than seven weeks, and each time was glorious, and we’re gonna do it again someday. And the most dramatic thing about this enormous country, as far as I’m concerned, is the difference between this side of the Mississippi and the other. The population density of these United States east of the Mississippi is almost four times as much as on the west side, and it shows. You cross the Mississippi from this side to the other, and there ain’t nobody there.

Read more »

I Wish I May

Sunday, April 28th, 2024

A couple nights ago, my wife, She Who Must Be Taunted, and I had dinner with the guitarist from my band and his wife, and she was telling us how she started college at a big fancy school until the money ran out, and then finished up at UMass-Boston but it took her six years, and then she went to Suffolk Law School at night while working full-time, and now she’s been a lawyer for thirty years, and I swear, I have never, ever been that determined to do anything in my entire life.

Read more »

Gestate Faster

Sunday, February 25th, 2024

As you know, I am recording the Next Great American Not Folk Album, because I am an aspiring rock star masquerading as a superannuated folk musician. And my brother, esteemed jazz bass player and mensch about town, contributed the bass tracks, and he is eagerly, nay, avidly anticipating the result of his labors, and he asked me, the other day, on the phone, “So when is this thing going to be done?” And the answer is: soon. It will be done soon. It will always be done soon. Because, like a baby, it takes as long as it takes.

Read more »

Grunt

Saturday, January 27th, 2024

I wrote this essay during the pandemic, and somehow never sent it out to you lovely people, but now? Now it’s time, because my pal Rob Mattson figures strongly in it and he’s promised to be at my next show and do the photography for the upcoming album and take pictures of my wife, She Who Must Be Taunted, for her new Web site with which she plans to take over the world. So.

Read more »

Vote For Yourself

Sunday, December 31st, 2023

Those of you who are faithful readers will recall that earlier this month, I participated in the Linden Tree Coffeehouse Winter Potpourri, which is sort of like the Hunger Games, except with guitars. I kid, I kid – although it is a competition, where the audience votes on the performers, not one of the acts was terminated with extreme prejudice, at least not while I was around. The winner was Mike Laureanno, from Fall River, and the runners-up were Mark Zelermyer and – drum roll – me! To be fair, it was a “virtual” tie for second, where I came in almost second and the Linden Tree folks weren’t about to split hairs, but I’m not complaining – I never win anything (I mean, I never enter anything, either, but that’s not the point, or, well, maybe it is the point, but don’t interrupt my train of thought). The almost-second-place prize was a pretty good one, too – I’ll be opening for Joe Jencks in June.

So I’m not complaining. But I will tell you a secret: I forgot to vote.

Read more »

Banjo

Wednesday, December 6th, 2023

My wife, She Who Must Be Taunted, bought a ukulele on a whim the other day. She was in Arlington Center, walking past Wood and Strings, and she thought, “I want to buy an instrument”, and went inside to explore her options. First the clerk suggested a mandolin, but SWMBT has some strength issues in her fingers, so that wasn’t a possibility, and then the clerk suggested a banjo, and SWMBT said, “Oh, no. My husband would divorce me.”

Read more »

Sound Like Yourself!

Monday, November 13th, 2023

As my faithful readers are aware, I’ve got an album I’m currently wrapping up (that’s the verb that’s used for all stages of production, by the way). My engineer and producer is the estimable Doug Kwartler, omniinstrumentalist and gracious man about town. I’m very happy with how things are sounding: they sound like me, and I was reminded recently that this is not, by any stretch, a foregone conclusion.

Read more »

What is this “guitar” you speak of?

Saturday, September 30th, 2023

Many years ago, my wife, She Who Must Be Taunted, and I went on a driving vacation to Nova Scotia, where we visited, among other lovely places, a historical village called Louisbourg, where you park your car and take a bus to a restored 18th century town. As we got off the bus, SWMBT grabbed my arm and pulled me to the back of the line, because she knew there was a reenacter at the town gate who picked on some unlucky visitor to question them about the nature of their curious clothing – the “what is this internet you speak of” sort of nonsense. (But the joke was on them, because the folks who restored the town didn’t use period-appropriate carpentry techniques.)

Read more »

These Are Not Your (My) Parents’ Earplugs

Monday, August 14th, 2023

I may have told you about my percussionist, David Troen-Krasnow. I met Dave in my old band, Agent 13, which you may recall we discussed in your last lesson. Dave is a fine, fine musician, and he keeps “busy”, by which I mean he’s in at least two other bands in addition to playing with me, and he’s constantly looking for another one. Maybe he sleeps? Maybe.

Read more »

The Paper Bag

Sunday, June 11th, 2023

Which bag, you say? Well, the one I couldn’t sing my way out of when I was in my band, of course.

Now, this is incredibly solipsistic of me – my band, at its peak, had 8 people in it, and I barely touched a microphone, and with good reason. But I’ve been listening to our old tapes, and I’m sticking out like a sore, well, bag.

Read more »